What Is the Root of The Confrontation Between Vanilla and Thematics?
The basis of any confrontation is a lack of understanding. That is, they say something like the same language, but do not understand each other at all. Thematics and vanilla couples never arrange violent battles with broken spears and impaired pride. And yet there is no understanding between them. Why? So, let's figure it out.
BDSM Is A Perversion
A common fable, which for many years excites the minds of everyone who looks at the Theme from the side and does not even take part as a spectator. In fact, BDSM is a deviation, but not a perversion in the very dirty sense of the word that most vanilla couples put into it.
The thematics realize their sexual, and not only, desire through dangerous practices, balancing on the verge of pain and pleasure, humiliation and happiness. It is very difficult to convey such feelings in words, that is, to explain to an uninformed person why this is so attractive.
There Are So Many Poses in The Kama Sutra, Why Do You Try This?
Indeed, when the thematic tries to explain and tell vanilla something, he, first of all, suggests trying to feel it. Feeling instead of a thousand words. However, you should know, understand and remember – BDSM is not always about sex, for sex and only sex.
BDSM sessions can end as you wish, including sexual intercourse, but ideally subspace or a state close to it. Especially painful practices require physical rest or a trivial hug after completion. And sex can be superfluous.
Therefore, the answer to the question about poses is somewhat inappropriate and incorrect – sex is not a reason for BDSM. And not always a consequence.
One Needs to Be Sick to Hurt Another Person
You cannot compare a sadist in BDSM and a sadist, sociopath or psychopath in a psychological sense. These are completely different personalities; they have different motives and the triggers are also different. But yes, in something you need to be a little bit crazy to take pleasure in hurting another. Even more insanity must be in those who have fun while taking the pain.
Vanilla couples all the time see loud headlines about the horrors of domestic violence, broken ribs and broken faces, and suddenly – S/M couple tells how great it is. Who will believe them! But the thing is that any practice in BDSM is not violence with the horrors and fears described in the criminal chronicle. This is a way to achieve mutual pleasure in a pair. By the way, the husband – home tyrant is much worse than Sadist partner, who can be stopped with a stop word.
In short, the root of the confrontation lies in the fact that vanilla does not try to understand the motivations and emotions of the thematics, and the thematics themselves do not seek to share them with those who are not able to understand them. Although, a little respect, the ability to listen and accept someone else's point of view, of course, would also not be superfluous.