Quick Guide to Being a Submissive in a Relationship
A quick guide to being a submissive in a relationship
So you have found your first BDSM master and it is time for you to develop a relationship with them, but you have no idea what you’re supposed to do? Don’t worry, this concern is common for people who are new to the whole lifestyle and are going through their first BDSM hookups and relationships. We have put together a little guide to help you get through these first steps on your exciting journey.
Embrace Your Feelings
Sometimes people feel ashamed or confused about their desire to be submissive. However, there is nothing wrong with that desire, and according to statistics, at least one quarter of the American population has engaged in sadistic practices during sex at least once. This means that there are people around you who probably feel the same way about being dominated (or maybe dominating) sexually, but it’s not a topic that would be freely discussed, so you don’t know about their true preferences and intentions. If you want to be a BDSM slave, embrace that wish and try to make the most out of it because that might be your path to a meaningful relationship and ultimately, happiness.
Get Some Information
It’s easy to get confused and lost in your own thoughts and desires if you lack information to decide whether you really want to be dominated. For some people, it might only be a phase, or a deceptively attractive notion that falls apart once they experience domination for the first time. If you read some books on the BDSM culture, it might get easier to imagine what it would feel like to be a sub. Also, attend a local munch event where people who are into BDSM practices gather to meet each other and share their experiences. If you find their spanking stories from the slave’s POV a turn-off, you may not really be submissive material. However, this doesn’t mean you can’t be a dominant or a switch (participate in BDSM activities both as a master and a slave).
Know Your Limits
If you are sure that you enjoy being a sub, you may want to figure out how far you are willing to go. Some people find the idea of light submission in role-playing games exciting enough, and they don’t want to venture any further. Others will embrace more BDSM practices, such as spanking, ballbusting, or fisting, and draw the line at that. But for some people, these forms of submission are not satisfactory enough, so they take it all the way and basically let the dominant control all aspects of their lives, including relationships, everyday choices, and of course, sexual practices. Finding the level of submission that feels right for you and sticking with it is going to be the basis of your fulfilling BDSM relationship.