Topping from the Bottom

Topping from the Bottom - the actions of the bottom partner to control the behavior of the top partner. These actions can be caused by various reasons: desire to get additional attention, to get action or sex, as well as jealousy, desire to change the format of the relationship in the couple, and so on. A classic manifestation of control from below is a masochist's provocation of the Upper for punishment (deliberate v*******n of his prohibitions, insubordination, insolence). This phenomenon has received a special name HJM (which means "cunning masochist") among thematicists. Other methods of manipulation are also used to control the bottom: speculation on the feeling of guilt, threatening to leave, and others. If the bottom abuses the Upper's position to get maximum pleasure for himself, it reduces the Upper to the position of a "device" and is destructive for the couple. Therefore, in the BDSM environment, such behavior by the bottom is frowned upon, as well as its encouragement by the Top. There are developed ways to counteract this phenomenon, which in principle do not differ from the ways to exclude manipulation in normal relationships. For example, to exclude HWM, interactions are periodically discussed, the bottom is encouraged to ask for action when the need arises, and when punishment is provoked, on the contrary, it is not flogged, but deprived of attention. Relationships in couples should be distinguished from control from below, where both partners enjoy "conquering" and "f*****g" the bottom by the Top, and various kinds of provocations can be part of the terms of the game and bring pleasure to both.